How do I describe the darkness inside my head?

The noise, the sound of silence mixed with thoughts

of confusion; States of anarchy and perplexity

run amuck to bring me down to destruction.


They--these thoughts, these people--

are indeed trying to destroy me.

They grow weary of my knowledge,

pretending they know me

and trying to place me in their world.



I am not a toy nor a “yes man.”

Faith is not the enemy of knowledge,

but I am the enemy of ignorance.

I hate it, disdain it, abhor it, anger it,

but never serve it.


Clouded thoughts can not think for themselves,

but I try to clear them away, try to see the light,

try to understand what the light is.

I beat my head on this splintered wall

until I bleed from desperation.


Forever I grasp to reach forever

and discover yet again

a bloody mess, empty hands,

and a heart that longs to be found

but forever lost among the darkness.